JonahWeiland.com

Sunny Southern California is back, baby! Today I woke up to sun streaming in my room and the sound of rain landing on my roof absent. After six days of constant, heavy and record breaking rain, the Southland begins the drying out period a day earlier than expected. I’m going to go outside now and revel in all this light goodness and run my car through the remaining puddles as quickly as I can so as to splash the SUV driving next to me.

Snapped with the camera phone while walking around Macy’s at the Sherman Oaks Fashion Plaza Saturday January 8th, 2005. Someone call the authorities.

Ok, I’m done with the rain. Seriously now, I’m done. To whomever controls the rain, please, make it stop. This is verging on stupidity.

I’ve lived in the San Fernando Valley my whole life. It’s the “suburbs” just north of Los Angeles. I grew up in the middle of the valley, but now live over in the Toluca Lake area (east valley) near Studio City and the NoHo Arts District. In my 33 years of living in Los Angeles I’ve never seen sustained rain of this nature before. Sure, we had those El Nino storms a while ago and they may have dumped a lot of rain and fucked up the coast something royal, but I don’t ever recall it raining this long, this hard and this consistently before. The leaks in my own home are becoming numerous. All the streets around my home are flooded, the flood control measures completely overwhelmed. You don’t dare step on grassy areas for fear the rain drenched ground will swallow you up whole like something out of a horror movie. Oh, and the local news is an absolutely joke. They’re all on “Stormwatch 2005″ with team coverage of the water falling from the sky, as it does. The poor weekend news reporters they send in to the rain are there to be mocked and laughed at.

Rain, seriously, fuck off.

Holy crap, can you believe it? It’s already January 4th, 2005! This year is just flying by with abandon! It seems like just yesterday it was New Years Day, and now look at things! Crazy.

The sky grows dark as I type this, what possibly may be my last message. I’m currenly sitting in the middle of what is likely the coolest storm I’ve ever witnessed in my time in Los Angeles. Hard hitting rain, a considerable amount of hail, heavy winds blasting my windows with hail and lightning and thunder of a sort not often seen in the Los Angeles valley areas. The hail has picked up once again and the wind is forcing it against my north facing windows.

This is clearly a sign that the aliens are on the march, manipulating the weather to serve as their advance invasion fleet, setting their sites on the small hamlet town of North Hollywood. If I survive this onslaught I promise not to download nearly as much porn as I used to. May your prayers be with me in this, my time of weather.