It Fucking Went Into Outer Space
It is my firm belief that if the world drank more Tang, the world would just be fucked in a more different way. I’m not saying it would be better, just different. I love Tang.
The astronauts drank the Tang. They may not have loved it, but they drank it. Considering the orange shit’s orbited the fucking earth, it’s a shame it’s drunk as little as it is by adults. It seems you either have to be a child or Latino to enjoy some Tang. I, on the other hand, break down barriers wherever I see them and drink Tang in celebration of my inner child … and maybe my inner Latino. If I have one. I’d prefer to have an inner Latina, but that’s a different discussion.
Tang is orangey goodness. It doesn’t taste like orange juice. It doesn’t even taste like fruit juice. It tastes like orange. This is the taste the color orange has and they’ve found a way to distribute it in powdery form. It’s like cocaine, but orange and without the nasal destructive powers.
Fuck Country Time. Fuck Crystal Light. Fuck all y’all powdered drinks and shit. Tang’s where it’s at.
Drink Tang. It’ll give you large nipples.
Ohhh, and two shots of vodka in Tang may not taste particularly good, but you will see trails.
